Aha Moment!

Yesterday, while I was sorting through my closet, I had the chance to listen to a CD our local homeschooling group purchased from the Teach Them Diligently Conference I attended last spring.
The CD was by Kristi Collins, of http://www.searchforbiblicaltruths.com/parents.html .  This talk , “Can God Really Use MY Family?” blew me away!!!!
Through the years, I’ve sought God’s guidance as I homeschool our children.  I absolutely love homeschooling and am so thankful that I have this wonderful opportunity to teach our children in this way.  I also have seen how God has guided me to teach them and approach this time of discipleship and teaching differently than I’d envisioned when I began homeschooling.
Before our oldest was born, I taught 2nd grade for a year and loved it.  I knew that I wanted to homeschool, but assumed it would look like what I did in the classroom (just on a smaller scale and at home).  Through God’s providence the first homeschool event I attended (when my oldest was the grand old age of barely 5) was a workshop by Mary Hood entitled “Relaxed Homeschooling.”  I figured that since she was barely 5, maybe the copycat school thing could wait until she was 6 or so. :)
Meanwhile, God’s lead me down a very different path.  I would say our style is very eclectic, a little of this and a little of that depending on the learning style of the child, their bend, and how God’s directing us that year.
I have noticed that as the girls have gotten older, my oldest is turning 18 in the fall and will “graduate” next year, I’ve felt the pressure of trying to make their schooling look like the traditional (read:everyone else) so they’ll be ready for college.  (Now, to be honest, I don’t see college as grades 13-16.  I know that God has college plans for some and other alternatives for others.  I just want them prepared for where ever God leads.)
Enter “the talk”. :) As I mentioned, I do try to seek God’s guidance on what to teach the girls and what materials to use.  I even last month asked the girls to make for me a list of things they are interested in or want to learn before they leave home so that we can work on it.  However, I’m embarrassed to admit that it never occurred to me to involve the girls in seeking God’s direction in this area.  Kristi challenged us to have the children also pray asking God what He’d have them learn.  (Then listen to what He’s telling them.)  This way, they can learn, while they’re at home, that God does direct in our everyday life.  They can grow in their personal relationships with Him as they see Him direct and lead.  WOW!  Never had I thought to do that.  (Another box I was in that I didn’t see.)
Also, as Kristi shared, the idea opened up for me of not using the "high school" years to study for college, but for life.  She and her daughter are both seeking God and doing what God’s calling her to do (for her this involves political campaigning, speaking, etc.).  If God calls her to college, she’ll be prepared. (Please know, i'm not saying to not be prepared for college. I'm saying seek God's direction on how He wants each child prepared for life. He'll take care of the details. I don't need to make them the focus.) ;) 
The challenge I heard whispered to me: prepare them for life as God directs.  (This will be college for some.  If so, as we seek God’s direction,  He’ll make sure that they’re prepared for that.)  It’s a matter of putting the focus on God and His direction rather than the status quo.
A little more box opening for me: we (not just me, but Ryan, the girls, and I) need to seek God’s guidance for what the girls need to learn.  He know His plans for them.   He knows what experiences they need and what knowledge they need to gain.  Why should I take the world’s ideas on what they need for training so that they’ll look like everyone else, instead of seeking God’s guidance in equipping them for their unique calling?
What a blessing and challenge!  Definitely can’t do it without God.  (Really can’t do anything without abiding in Him, but how often I forget that and go into autopilot.)
May you blessed this day as you seek His guidance for you! :)

Lessons Learned

This week our oldest two girls have been at Child Evangelism Training (which they love!).  Our other two girls have been playing with some very sweet friends of ours who live about an hour and a half away (which they also love!).  My honey's been working late, although we were thankful that he was able to get home on time one night so we could have a date night. :)  All that to say that, for the first time in almost 18 years, I had a lot of time to myself.  During that time I learned quite a bit:

I learned about getting rid of excess (as I shared in yesterday's post).  It also helped that I was cleaning out my dresser and closet and got rid of 5 trash bags full of clothes - really?  That's almost embarrassing.  I don't actually buy clothes very often at all.  I'd just keep clothes past their usefulness.  I also learned once again that we actually had a desk under all the clutter in the dining room.  I still have multiple things that need gone through, but Rome wasn't built in a day, right? :)

God showed me something else yesterday while I was walking.  The 2nd half of Philippians 4:11 came to mind, "for I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content."  Followed closely by Philippians 4:13, "I can do all things through him who strengthens me."  As I was walking and talking with God and mulling over the idea of excesses, I realized that for me excess is often a symptom of discontentedness.  Wow, I'd been discontent and never really put my finger on it.  This tied to so many things.  I always have an Amazon shopping cart going.  Really?!?  I did just tell you how much clutter is in my home and what I'm going through and getting rid of.  Could it be that I'm not being content with what I have, which is why I'm always wondering what else is out there?
Same for food.  If I'm full, but then thought about a chocolate chip cookie, is it discontentedness that makes me get up and eat something for the taste when I'm not even hungry?  As I thought and prayed, I felt God showing me that even things in the past that affected our marriage were really tied to being discontent.  And I never even realized it and certainly never thought of myself as discontent.  I also realized that it's a symptom of misplaced focus.  If I'm abiding in Christ, how could I be discontent?  Wow - great thing to learn.  It is my goal to be content with where God has me.  (I came home from my walk and this eye opening experience to find the above picture on facebook.) :)  1 Timothy 6:6 "Now there is great gain in godliness with contentment"

Another lesson God showed me was that He is with me.  Hebrews 13:5b "I will never leave you nor forsake you."  I always thought of that verse in the context of times of trouble.  However, I've seen through this week, that He is and will always be with me, in times of trouble but also in times of peace.  You must understand, that I LOVE  being a wife and mother.  I think that my husband and kids are the best and I love hanging out with them.  In fact, that's been one of my fears - my kids growing up.  My dream for my life was to be a wife and mother and I'm relishing that role.  I worried that once my kids grew up, the best part of my life would be over.  While I'm still loving that my kids are still young and at home, this week was a little glimpse for me that, even though I had a lot of alone time, I wasn't really alone.  And it was good.  I enjoyed getting projects done and spending time with God while I went about my day.  (I know He's always with me.  But in the busyness of this stage of life, I'm often talking to so many other people that I don't talk to Him as often.  Hopefully that will change.)

So there you have it, 3 things I learned this week.  Oops, make it 4.  I also learned that I talk to myself a lot...I talk to the animals a bunch too! ;)

Get Rid of Excess

"Surrendering all the excesses so we can more fully serve the Lord is foundational to the work we do in our homes."
The Heart of Simplicity introduction by Courtney Dunkin

That's it.  I didn't realize it but my life is full of excesses. 
I have extra stuff I don't need.  I eat extra food I don't need.  I live with excesses.
The excesses begin to burden and distract me.
My desire is to live a life fully and completely committed to Christ.  I don't want anything to get in the way.  I desire to walk in the Spirit (Romans 8:4, Galatians 5:16) and ask Him to open my eyes to see things as He sees them and to move my feet to walk as He directs.

However, all these excesses really tie my heart to the temporal world. 

I love books.  (What homeschooling mom doesn't?)  ;)  But all the excess is not good stewardship and the burden that comes from more stuff than I need (books & other things) distracts me.  (It is distracting/frustrating to not know where I'm going to place this new treasure because our bookshelves are full of other treasures.  It's a blessing, but one I need to control rather than having it control me.)  Often I focus on the feelings of frustration rather than living my life in the Spirit with His fruit evident in my words and actions.  (It's hard to be peaceful and joyful when feeling frustrated by the stuff and that frustration is compounded by my lack of discipline.

Likewise, food can be a struggle for me.  (I didn't really realize this for a long time.)  Sometimes I'm wanting what I want when I want it regardless of if I'm hungry, which moves food from the category of a gift from God to fulfill a need to the category of simply a way to meet my desires and make me happy.  This takes my focus off God (the Giver) and places it directly on me and what I want.  I allow my desires (my flesh) to rule over me rather than me ruling over it.

I also sometimes struggle over the other end of the spectrum.  After being diagnosed with high cholesterol, I knew I wanted to avoid medication and wanted to find a way to naturally change those numbers.  This put my focus on food, but in a different way.  Now it put food, health, and research at the foremost of my thoughts.  While I know that taking care of our health is often a matter of stewardship (and discipline) and it's good to be informed and make intentional choices, I also sensed the Holy Spirit showing me that I was starting to act as if I were the one in control and as if everything depended on me.  (Inflated sense of self and focus on self is never a good thing.)  It also increased my fear over bad health and was putting my focus on temporal things, rather than eternal.

In 100 years, I'll be in heaven praising Jesus.  Things I've done on earth with eternal purposes will matter.  Things I've done with temporal purposes won't.  So, while I need to take care of things with temporal purposes (stewardship of health, cleaning house, feeding my family, getting the brakes checked on the car, etc.), my focus must be on Christ and walking with Him as He leads. 

I need to simplify my life to decrease the clutter (physical, emotional, spiritual) so that I won't be distracted from hearing Him.  I need to get rid of excesses.  Those areas of excess often exhibit control over me.  I desire to have nothing control me but God.